Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Will the answers ever come?

Well it's Monday and still no word. Sometimes I wonder if maybe I'm just being impatient. Am I worrying too much? Is he fine? Is he not fine? When will the answers to my questions come? I've prayed. I've speculated. I've rationalized and I am still no closer to knowing anything. I miss him. I can't talk to him and I can't get a letter from him soon enough to ease my mind. I wanted that 5 minute call on August 22nd. I wanted it so desperately and I know that he did too. I just wanted to hear my husband's voice on the other end of the phone telling me he was alright and that he loved me. I wanted to tell him that I am doing everything that I can to get to him in Texas. I wanted to tell him that the kids are OK. Sure I can say all that in a letter but there is just something about hearing the voice of the person you love more than life telling you how much they love you and miss you. It's reassuring and it's real and it's raw and there is nothing better. Don't get me wrong, I don't doubt for one second that my husband loves me more than anything and I know he doesn't doubt my love for him. It just would have been nice to be able to tell him instead of sending it in an email.

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