Friday, August 26, 2011

The Worry of One

Well it's Friday and I am still no further ahead in knowing why my husband was transferred. I know where he is. I just don't know why and I've been stressing about it for over a week now. Has his medical condition worsened? Did he have surgery? Is he alright? These are questions that would no doubt plague anyone's mind when information is not forthcoming about the person they love. The distance that we are from one another only exacerbates my worry. I can't just drive to the prison for a visit and see for myself. You see I am the type of person that needs to see it to believe it and until I see my husband for myself with my own eyes, I will never believe that he is alright despite his constant reassurances to the contrary. That's just the way I'm wired and it's one of the things that makes me, me.

A very dear American  friend of mine offered to call my husband's unit the other day to see if he could find out anything for me. He spoke to the warden's secretary and she advised him that my husband was definitely in transient status which, to those that don't know, means he's only there temporarily and will be moved out again to another more permanent unit. She also advised that he wasn't there for medical reasons and that his medical condition was the same - no better but certainly no worse so that was good. She also said that he wasn't there because of any disciplinary issues either which, of course, I already knew. One thing about my husband is that he has always been a patient man but since being in TDC he has become more patient than any 10 men. He will do what is expected of him and probably more because he is a very goal-oriented person and right now his primary goal is coming home to his wife and children.

I did find out that he could be moving to either a trustee or pre-release unit. One thing I've learned from having a husband in TDC and that is to take everything you hear with a grain of salt. Unless I hear it directly from my husband, it's nothing more than speculation and speculation will drive you crazy. While the woman in the warden's office was very nice and tried to be as reassuring as possible, I cannot and will not take her at her word as to where my husband might be going and why he might be going there. I will only breathe a sigh of relief when my husband himself tells me what's what. He is the love of my life and it is only his words that can calm me and only his words that keep me right where I belong - back to back and swinging at any and all comers!

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